What Pastors Wish Church Members Knew About Their Children

Family Enjoying Day In Park

A recent Twitter poll of pastors who were asked what they wish church members knew about their children.  Here are the top seven responses in order of frequency.

1. Don’t expect more out of pastors’ kids (PKs) than any other kids. “My children need to have the same expectations as the other children in the church. They are not some kind of spiritual superstars because their dad’s a pastor.”

2.  Please offer encouragement to my children. “It’s not always easy to be a pastors kid.  The glass house thing is real. I am so thankful for the church members who go out of their way to encourage my children.”

3.  Realize that they are kids.   Sometimes church members seem to think my kids are miniature adults. They expect them to act like a 40 year old instead of an  11 year old.”

4.  Please don’t call them “PKs.” “Their identities should not be based on their father’s vocation. They have their own unique and special identities.”

5.  Please pray for my children.   I am blessed to have people in my church who pray for my three children every day.  They know the special challenges of being a pastors kid.

6.  Our kids see and hear more than you may think. “After one particularly tough church business meeting years ago,  my then seven-year-old daughter asked me if I was going to get fired.

7.  Don’t make us choose between our kids and the church.  “Too many PKs have grown up bitter and disillusioned about the church. Dad gave more attention to church members than his own children.”

Source: Thom Rainer


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